It’s important to know multiple (or at least your opponents’) sides of an issue.
Recently, Barack Obama came out for gay marriage, stating:
“But– but I think it’s important for me– to say to them that as much as I respect ’em, as much as I understand where they’re comin’ from– when I meet gay and lesbian couples, when I meet same-sex couples, and I see– how caring they are, how much love they have in their hearts– how they’re takin’ care of their kids. When I hear from them the pain they feel that somehow they are still considered– less than full citizens when it comes to– their legal rights– then– for me, I think it– it just has tipped the scales in that direction.”
Recently, Bill Clinton came out for gay marriage, stating:
“Among other things, these couples cannot file their taxes jointly, take unpaid leave to care for a sick or injured spouse or receive equal family health and pension benefits as federal civilian employees. Yet they pay taxes, contribute to their communities and, like all couples, aspire to live in committed, loving relationships, recognized and respected by our laws.”
Recently, Hillary Clinton came out for gay marriage, stating:
“LGBT Americans are our colleagues, our teachers, our soldiers, our friends, our loved ones,” said Clinton. “They are full and equal citizens and deserve the rights of citizenship. That includes marriage.”
Now, I am opposed to gay marriage because of my learning and thinking about why marriage exists in the first place on a variety of economic, biological, and social grounds. But if you’re going to argue for gay marriage, there are some at-least-reasonable-if-not-the-best arguments. The above political figures chose not to use them.
The usual arguments–articulated above–reflect the Marriage 2.0 view of marriage as a government-approved institutionalization of feelings, with the side benefit of reducing the paperwork required of a the government and a couple in contractually codifying certain living arrangements and tax benefits. These arguments are inherently reactive–they posit gay marriage as a response to other conditions for the benefit of a few people, not an active step towards improving our overall social framework–and emotional because they are all value-based without the supporting facts or philosophical underpinnings (is marriage really a right of citizenship?) to really evaluate them.
But the better argument, I think–less subject to reductio ad absurdum and counterexamples–is that marriage as an institution is a signal and assimilative tool. This would be the proactive approach oriented toward increasing social coherence.
Common acceptance of a historically neglected or abused people can be increased or ameliorated through adoption of all customs of the local populace. Additionally, the age-old argument over whether faith prompts works or works prompt faith plays a part here.
To draw a parallel (though of course not an exact analogy): conservatives often argue for more integration of immigrants–teaching english, local customs, to immigrants etc etc to better assimilate the population and enable their functioning in the society.
Marriage might be a sort of socially assimilative institution. If you perceive gays as outsiders wanting to be integrated into society, adopting and allowing marriage–the most fundamental social institution that Americans have–for those gay members would not only have the salutory effects of increasing the overall perception of marriage as a valuable institution but also displace the gay culture which previously existed, thereby strengthening the American cultural fabric as a whole.
Now, there are problems with that argument too. However, I think it’s probably the strongest logical (as opposed to emotional) case that’s out there, although I can hardly conceive of any of the quoted figures likening gays to culturally foreign immigrants.
Thoughtful criticism welcome.